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Scourge of society! Nolife scum!
April 22, 2011, 23:30
Filed under: Uncategorized

It’s okay to be a useless kid, but not okay to be a useless grownup. Time is passing fast and I guess I’m already an unwilling member of the second category. Sadly, I have to face the truth that my private liking of violence isn’t going to take me very far in a profession as construction worker, I’m just not cut out for it. And for many other things as well. At the odd jobs I took up before, I was always the one who’s most inclined to break a plate, or to issue the wrong receipt.

The only thing I’m possibly good at: thinking up fancy symbolism. I have a nasty habit of attaching too much meaning to everything. So when I choose an image to use in a book, for example, I’ll go on and on thinking about what each item symbolizes, and if I arrange a few of them this way or that, how they’ll form a certain story. I feel very happy when I do this kind of things. But all that excitement is taken to bits when I realise that the story exists only in my own head, and no one else’s.

Of course! No one consciously burrows for meaning when leafing through stuff. Unless the stuff belongs to Bob Dylan, in which case every word is sacred. (By the way, have you heard Rebecca Black’s Friday sung by “Bob Dylan”? All of a sudden “Yesterday was Thursday/ Today is Friday/ Tomorrow is Saturday and Sunday comes afterwards” is hailed as a literary masterpiece)

So it’s kind of meaningless then, this so-called ability of mine.

Another ability I may have: creating knick knacks that are of little purpose, but are fun to make. Would you fancy owning a pimple ring which oozes out real pus when squeezed? I think I will try to make one once I find out how!

That’s all I can think about regarding my future career, for now. I don’t know why I’m deliberating career plans in the middle of so much work, but life feels more and more threadbare these days. And I can’t see ahead very well.

Does everyone reach this kind of dead-end at this age? Not knowing what to do with themselves?

Mom says that becoming an adult is a very natural thing, there’s no “how” or “why” about it.


4 Comments so far
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i heard you pon all your classes this week… made you contemplate a lot more? haha. good luck with the submissions!

Comment by limshuning

Don’t worry jiayin, everything will come naturally. Besides u’re not the only one in this world with dilemmas about what to do and who to become in life. Jia you for Typo and GD! Really looking forward to ur book!

Comment by yibo

thank you :-) :-) good luck you guys! one last week!

Comment by zhree

Pus-filled pimple ring????!!!

Comment by lyd

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